The Great Depression

Guys, I know I haven't updated, but it is really difficult these days as my laptop is out of commission and the only time I have for blogging is nap time and bed time, and both require absolute silence upstairs, where the other computer lives. I have two or three blogs in the making, that I will update as soon as said power cord comes in the mail...in 4-6 days. I am stealing 2 minutes while Oliver watches Word World to sorta update you on my status as a hugely pregnant woman. I am 38 weeks plus some days, and am very very achy. If I snap at you when you call to see how I am (at 8am), or if I am short with you when you are shocked I wasn't at home in the morning when you came to call, or if my husband bites your head off at work when you ask how I am feeling, I do truly apologize. I call these last two weeks The Depressed weeks, and as we know from watching drug commercials, depression hurts everyone...

The most hurt by this pregnancy funk is no doubt my son. All he wants is me to be able to get down on my hands and knees and draw endless chalk drawings! Or make two dozen trains from his HORRIBLY designed Lego type toys that do NOT fit together. Or dig in the mud garden that I haven't had the energy to plant anything in because, well, squatting makes it feel like my body is splitting apart. He is doing his best to deal with my irritation. He feeds himself (a box of thin mints), and he goes to the potty (but not without a buddy!!), he makes up games to play ("how loud can I scream?") and he always lets me know where he is (Mommymommymommymommymommy!).

It is just that, when your lower half of your body doesn't really, MOVE, persay, it is really hard to keep a sunny disposition. Rolling over in bed hurts so much I may just the whole sleep thing and sitting up all night in a recliner. Luckily, there is always a Real Housewives of some city on at all times. It doesn't help that I picked the most depressing book ever written to be reading right now, Angela's Ashes. Good god, why does anyone live in Ireland!? Seriously though, the last two weeks or so of pregnancy are the worst, you start convincing yourself that the baby is never coming out and you will stay pregnant forever. I totally get why women believe their doctors and are induced way before their due date. Doctors must know that they are mind-fucking these poor women...

To be honest, the only thing that is keeping me from doing such a thing is remembering how hard it is with a newborn and how as miserable as I am right now, it might be worse in a few weeks and I will beg to put the little bugger back inside. Sorry this is a downer post, sometimes not everything is peaches and cream. I do want this baby, I am just exhausted!!